This Lullaby
by xLily
Summary: Alice has had many boyfriends in her life. But before anything gets too serious she gives them "the speech"- so why can't she seem to dump Jasper? Find out! full summary inside. All human
1. Chapter 1

**Full Description: Alice always knows when to give a guy "the speech"-right after the initial romantic rush, but before anything gets too serious. She's had her fair share of boyfriends, and she's learned all there is to learn from here mother, who's currently working on husband number five. So why is it that Alice can't seem to dump Jasper? It can't be that he's messy and disorganized. And it certainly isn't that he's a musician-just like Alice's father, a man she never knew because he left before she was born. Could it be that Alice's romantic rules to live don't apply anymore??**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the story line-it's from a book I read- or the characters-Stephanie Meyer does.**

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The name of this song if "This Lullaby." At this point, I've heard it about a million times. Approximately.

All my life I've been told about how my father wrote it the day I was born. He was on the road somewhere in Texas, already split from my mom. The story goes that he got word of birth, sat down with his guitar, and just came up with it. He'd been writing music all his life, but in the end it would be the only song he was known for.

Now, the song was playing overhead as I sat in a plastic chair at the hospital, in the first week of June. It was warm, everything was blooming, and summer was practically here. This meant, of course, that it was time for my mother to get married again.

This was her fourth time, fifth if you include my father. I chose not to. But they were, in her eyes, married. She takes on husbands the way other people change their hair color: out of boredom, listlessness, or just feeling that this next one will fix everything once and for all. Back when I was younger, when I asked about my dad and how they'd met, when I was actually still curious, she'd just sigh, waving her hand, and say, "Oh, Alice, it was the seventies. You know."

My mother always thinks I know everything. But she's wrong. All I knew about the seventies was what I'd learned in school and from the History Channel: Vietnam, President Carter, disco. And all I knew about my father was "This Lullaby." My father may be gone, but the song goes on. Eventually it will outlive me.

It was in the middle of the second chorus that You Found Me by The Fray when Carlisle stuck his head out of his office and saw me. "Alice, honey, sorry you had to wait. Come on in."

I got up and followed him. In eight days, Carlisle would become my stepfather, joining a not-so-exclusive group. He and my mother met right here in this hospital, when we came in to get my brother from a check-up.

"So, Alice" Carlisle said as we sat down, him in the big swiveling leather chair behind the desk, me in the not very comfortable chair opposite. I looked around the room to see what was hanging in here. There was a picture of him and my mom on there first date, a scholarship, and a lot more that I couldn't read.

Now, Carlisle shifted in his seat, adjusting his tie. He looked very young, but he was in his early 30's now. And he adored my mother, God help him. "What do you need from me today?"

"Okay" I said, reaching into my back pocket for the list I'd brought "I double-checked with the tux place and they're expecting you this week for the final fitting. The rehearsal dinner list is pretty much set a seventy-five, and the caterer will need a check for the rest of the deposit by Monday"

"Fine" he opened a drawer and pulled out the leather binder where he kept his checkbook, then reached into his jacket pocket for a pen "how much for the caterer?"

I glanced down at my paper, swallowed, and said "Five thousand"

He nodded and started writing. To Carlisle, five thousand bucks was hardly any money at all. This wedding itself was setting him back a good twenty, and that didn't seem to faze him either. Add to it the renovation that had been done on our house so we could all live together like on happy family, the debt he was forgiving on my brother's truck and just the day-to-day maintenance of living with my mother. But then again, this was his first wedding, first marriage. He was a rookie. My family however had long been of pro status.

He ripped out the check, slid it across the desk, and smiled "what else?" he asked me.

I looked down at my list again "okay, just the band, I think. The people at the reception hall were asking-"

"It's under control" he said, waving his hand "they'll be there. Tell your mother not to worry."

I smiled at this, because he expected me to, but we both knew she wasn't worrying at all about the wedding. She'd picked out her dress, decided on flowers, and then pushed the rest off on me, claiming she needed absolutely every free second to work on her latest design for a new house that was just built.

Most people put off my mother's erratic behavior to the fact that she is a designer, as if that explained everything. To me that was just an excuse. I mean, brain surgeons can be crazy too, but no on says it's all right. Unfortunately for my mother, I am alone in this opinion.

"…is so soon!" Carlisle said, tapping his finger on the calendar "can you believe it?"

"No" I said, wondering what the first part of his sentence had been. I added "it's just amazing"

He smiled at me, and then glanced back down at the calendar, where now I saw the wedding day, June 12, was circled several times in different colors of makers. I guess you couldn't blame him for being excited. For the last fifteen years he'd lived alone in a condo right off the highway. Now, in nine days, he would get not only my mother, Esme, but also, in a package deal, my brother Emmett and me. And he was happy about it. It _was _amazing.

Just then the intercom on his desk buzzed, loudly, and a man's voice came on "Carlisle, Kelly has a patient waiting. Should I send them in?"

Carlisle glanced at me, then pushed down the button and said "Sure. Give me five seconds"

He stood up, fixing his tie. "Hate to push you out, but-"

"I'm done" I told him tucking the list back in my pocket

"I really appreciate all you're doing for us, Alice" he said as he walked around the desk. He put one hand on my shoulder, Dad-style, and I tried not to remember all the stepfathers before him that had done the same thing, carrying the same meaning. They all thought they were permanent too.

"No problem" I said as he moved his hand and opened the door for me. Waiting for us out in the hallway was a nurse standing with a girl, who looked like she was at least 18 or 19. She was clutching her phone in one hand while a tissue was in her other hand. I noticed her eyes were all puffy and red.

"Carlisle" the nurse said "this is Kelly, and we're trying to tell her that everything is going to work out fine"

Kelly looked like she was going to burst out in tears again as she looked nervously from Carlisle to me, then back to Carlisle "I just-" she sputtered

"Kelly, Kelly" Carlisle said soothingly "let's just all sit down for a minute and talk about what we can do. Okay?"

"Okay" Kelly said, somewhat uncertainly, and started into Carlisle's office. As she passed she glanced at me nervously.

"Alice" Carlisle said quietly "I'll see you later, okay?"

"Okay" I told him, and then watched as Kelly made her way inside.

"Now Kelly" said Carlisle, sitting in his chair. The door closing on them, and I could barely see them now "what can I do to make you happy?"

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

I was halfway across the hallway when I remembered that my mother had asked me to please remind Carlisle about cocktails tonight.

I turned around and walked back down the hallway to Carlisle's office. The door was still closed, and I could hear voices murmuring behind it.

The clock on the opposite wall was the school kind, with big black numbers and a wobbly second hand. It was already one fifteen. The day after my high school graduation and here I was, not beach bound or sleeping off a hangover like everyone else. I was running wedding errands, like a paid employee, while my mother lay in her king-size bed.

And that was all it took to feel it. That slow, simmering burn in my stomach that I always felt when I let myself see how far the scale had tipped in her favor. I crossed one leg over the other and closed my eyes, pressing my fingers into the arms of my chair. Just a few weeks of this, I told myself, and I'm gone.

Just then, someone plopped down hard into the chair on my left, knocking me sideways into the wall. I hit my elbow on the molding there, right in the funny bone, which sent a tingly zap all the way up to my fingers. And suddenly, just like that, I was pissed. It's amazing how all it takes is on shove to make you furious.

"What the hell" I said, pushing off the wall, ready to take off the head of whatever stupid doctor had decided to get cozy with me. My elbow was still buzzing, and I could feel a hot flush creeping up my neck.

I turned my head and saw it wasn't a doctor at all. It was a guy with honey blonde curly hair, around my age, wearing a black T-shirt. And for some reason he was _smiling._

"Hey there" he said cheerfully" how's it going?"

"What is your problem?" I snapped, rubbing my elbow

"Problem?"

"You just slammed me into the wall, asshole"

He blinked "Goodness" he finally said "Such _language"_

I just looked at him.

"The thing is" he said, as if we were discussing the weather or world politics "I saw you out in the hallway. I was over in the waiting room?"

I was sure I was glaring at him. But he kept talking.

"I just thought to myself, all of a sudden, that we had something in common. A natural chemistry, if you will. And I had a feeling that something big was going to happen. To both of us. That we were meant to be together."

"You got all this" I said, clarifying "sitting in the waiting room?"

"You didn't feel it?" he asked

"No. I did, however, feel you slamming me into the wall" I said

"That" he said lowering his voice and leaning closer to me "was an accident. An oversight. Just an unfortunate result of the enthusiasm I felt knowing I was about to talk to you"

I just looked at him. Overhead, the speakers were now playing Love Song by Sara Bareilles. Perfect timing. Not.

"Go away" I told him

He smiled again, running a hand through his hair.

"You know what?" he said pointing up at the speaker "from now on, forever"- pointed up again "this will be our song"

"Oh, Jesus" I said, and right then I was saved, as Carlisle's office door swung open and Kelly, led by the nurse came out. She was holding a yellow folder that held a lot of papers in it. She looked tired and like she had been crying the whole time.

I stood up, and the guy beside me leapt to his feet "wait, I only want-"

"Carlisle?" I called out, ignoring him.

"Just take this" the guy said, grabbing my hand. He turned it palm up before I could even react, and pulled a pen out of his back pocket, then proceeded-I am not joking-to write a name and phone number in the space between my thumb and forefinger.

"You are insane" I said jerking my hand back, which caused the last digits to smear and knock the pen out of his hand. It clattered to the floor, rolling under a nearby gumball machine.

"Yo, Romeo!" someone yelled from the waiting room, and there was a burst of laugher "Come on man, let's go!"

I looked up at him, still shocked. Talk about not respecting a person's boundaries.

He glanced behind him, and then back at me "I'll see you soon" he said grinning at me

"Like hell" I replied, but then he was already going, dodging the truck and minivan in the parking lot. From the window I could see a beat-up white van that was idling the curb. The back door flung open and he climbed in. then the door slammed, the horn beeped, and the van chugged out of the lot, bumping its muffler on the way out.

I looked down at my hand, where in black ink was scrawled 788-46somethingsomething, with one word beneath it. God, his handwriting was sloppy. A big J, a smear on the last letter. Jasper.

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When I got home, the first thing I noticed was the music. Classical, soaring, filling the house with wailing oboes and flowing violins. Then, the small of my mom's favorite candle, vanilla. On the floor were crumbled papers leading to the design room.

Thank God, I though. She's designing again.

I dropped my keys on the table by the door and bent down, picking up on balled-up piece of paper by my feet, then un-crumbled it as I walked toward the kitchen. My mother was very superstitious about her work, and only worked with certain tools and paper. To my mom, designing the inside of people's houses for them is professional as she likes to call it.

I continued picking up discarded papers as I walked, balling them into my hand. The music and got louder as I walked into the kitchen, where my brother, Emmett, was ironing a shirt on the kitchen table.

"Hey" he said as he put some m&m in his mouth. The iron hissed as he picked it up, and then smoothed it over the edge of the collar of the shirt, pressing down hard.

"How long's she been at it?" I asked, pulling out the trash can from under the sink and dumping the papers into it.

He shrugged, letting the steam hiss out and stretching his fingers "A couple hours now, I guess"

I glanced past him, through the dining room to the sun porch, where I could see my mother sitting on a chair, a candle beside her, drawing away. It was always weird to watch her.

I sat down at the table and flipped through a stack of mail by the fruit bowl as Emmett turned the shirt over, nudging the iron slowly around one cuff. He was a really slow ironer, to the point that more than once I'd just jerked it away, unable to stand how long it took him to do just the collar.

"Bid night tonight?" I asked him. He was leaning close to the shirt now, really focusing on the front pocket.

"Rosalie's having a dinner party" he said "It's smart casual"

"Smart casual?"

"It means" he said slowly, still concentrating "no jeans, but not quite a sport jacket event either, ties optional. That kind of thing"

I rolled my eyes. Six months ago, my brother wouldn't have been able to define smart much less casual. Ten months earlier, on his twenty-first birthday, Emmett had gotten busted at a party selling pot. It wasn't his first brush with the law, by any means: during high school he'd racked up a few breaking and entering, one DWI, and one possession of a controlled substance. But the party bust did him in, and he did jail time. Only three months, but it scared him enough to shape up and get a job at the local Jiffy Lube, where he'd met Rosalie brought her BMW M3 convertible in for a mile check-up.

Rosalie was what my mother called "a piece of work" which meant she wasn't scared of either of us and didn't care if we knew it. She was a tall girl with blonde hair, whip smart and had done more with my brother in six months than we'd ever managed in twenty-one years.

Now Emmett lifted the shirt off the table and held it up, shaking it slightly "what do you think?"

"Looks okay" I said "you missed a big crease on the right sleeve, though"

He glanced down at it, then sighed "this is so freaking hard" he said, putting it back on the table "I don't see why people bother"

"I don't see why _you _bother" I said "since when do you need to be wrinkle free, anyway? You used to consider wearing pants dressing up"

"Cute" he said, making a face at me "you wouldn't understand, anyway"

"Yeah, right. Excuse me, Eggbert, I keep forgetting you're the smart one"

He straightened the shirt, not looking at me "what I mean" he said slowly "is that you'd just have to know what it's like to want to do something nice for somebody else. Out of consideration. Out of _love"_

"Oh, Jesus" I said

"Exactly" he picked up the shirt again. The wrinkle was still there, not that I was going to point it out now "that's exactly what I'm talking about. Compassion. Relationships. Two thing you are sadly, and sorely, lacking"

"I am the queen of relationships" I said "and hello, I just spent the entire morning planning our mother's wedding. That is so freaking compassionate of me"

"you" he said, folding the shirt neatly over one arm "have yet to experience any kind of serious commitment-"

"What?"

"-and you have bitched and moaned so much about the wedding I'd hardly call that compassionate"

I just stood there, staring at him. There was no reasoning with him lately. It was like he'd been brainwashed by some religion cult "who are you?" I asked him

"All I'm saying" he replied, quietly "is that I'm really happy. And I wish you could be happy too. Like this"

"I am happy" I snapped, and I meant it, although it sounded bitter just because I was pissed off "I am" I repeated in a more level voice.

He reached over and patted my shoulder "I'll see you later" he said, turning and heading out of the kitchen and up the stairs to his room. I watched him go and realized I was clenching my teeth, something I found myself doing too often lately.

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Ok so tell me what you think! Do you like it? Please review


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey guys thanks so much for commenting!!!! It means a lot to me! **

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Not the characters or the story line-I just changed it around a bit.**

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It was time to dump James.

"Tell me again why you're doing this?" Jessica asked me. She was sitting on my bed, flipping through my CDs. "I mean, I like James."

"You like everybody" I told her, leaning closer to the mirror and examining my eye liner.

"That's not true" she said, picking up a CD and turning it over to examine the back "I never liked Mr. Taylor. He always looked at my boobs when I went up to do theorems on the board. He looked at everybody's boobs"

"Jess" I said "high school is over. And besides, teachers don't count"

"I'm just saying" she said

"The thing is" I went on as I brushed my hair "that it's summer now, and I'm leaving for school in September. And James…I don't know. He's just not a keeper. He's not worth working my schedule around if we're only going to break up in a few weeks anyways."

"But you might not break up"

I leaned back, admiring my handiwork "we'll break up" I said "I'm not going to Princeton with any other entanglements than absolutely necessary"

She bit her lip, then tucked a curl behind one ear, ducking her head with the hurt expression she always got lately when we talked about the end of summer. "Well, of course not" she said quietly "I mean, why would you?"

"Jess" I said, sighing "I didn't mean you. You know that. I just mean-" I gestured to the bedroom door, slightly ajar, beyond we could hear my mom's favorite music playing "you know"

She nodded. But in truth she didn't understand. Jessica was the only one of us who was even slightly sentimental about high school being over. She actually cried at graduation. Meanwhile, me, Bella, and Angela couldn't wait to get across that stage and grab our diploma, to be free at last.

Jessica reached over and turned up the radio, filling the room with some boppy song with a la-la-la chorus. I walked over to my closet, pulling open the door to examine my options.

"So what do you wear to dump somebody?" she asked me "black, for mourning? Or something cheerful and colorful, to distract them from their pain? Or maybe you wear some sort of camouflage, something that will help you disappear quickly in case they don't take it well"

"Personally" I told her, pulling out a pair of skinny jeans and turning them in my hand "I'm thinking dark and slimming, a bit of cleavage. And clean underwear"

"You wear that every night"

"This is every night" I replied. I knew I had a clean purple shirt I like somewhere in my closet, but I couldn't find it.

"Not for James" she said, and when I glanced at her she added "I mean, this is a big night for him. He's getting dumped. And he doesn't even _know _it yet. He's probably eating a hamburger or flossing or picking up dry cleaning, and he has no idea. No inkling"

I gave up on the purple shirt, pulling out a white tank top with a dark blue jacket instead. I didn't even know what to say to her. Yes, it sucked getting dumped. But wasn't it better to just be honest? To admit that your feeling for someone is never going to be powerful enough to justify taking up any more of their time? I was doing him a favor, really.

A half hour late, when we pulled up to Texaco (gas station-pretty sure that's it), Bella was waiting for us. As usual, Angela was late.

"Hey" I said, walking over to her. She was leaning against her big tank of a car, a 1953 Chevrolet Pickup Truck with a sagging bumper, and sucking on an Extra Large Coke. They were the best bargain in twon, at $1.39, and served a multitude of uses.

"I'm getting skittles" Jessica called out, slamming her door "anybody want anything?"

"Sprite" I told her, and reached for my money, but she shook me off, already heading inside "Extra Large!"

She nodded as the door swung shut behind her.

"Where's Angela?" I asked Bella, but she just shrugged, not even taking her lips off the straw of her Coke "Did we not say seven-thirty sharp?"

She raised an eyebrow at me "Calm down" she said shaking her drink "it's just six right now"

I sighed, leaning back against her car. I hated when people were late. But Angela always ran five minutes behind, on a good day. Jessica was usually early, and Bella was Bella; solid as rock, there on the dot. She'd been my best friend since the 4rth grade, and was the only one I knew I could always depend on.

"Looky look" she said now in her flat voice, crossing her arms over her chest "the queen has arrived"

Angela pulled up beside us, cutting the engine on her car and flipping down the visor to check her lipstick. Bella sighed loudly, but I ignored her. This was old news, her and Angela, like background music. Only if things were really quiet or dull did the rest of us even notice it anymore.

Angela got out, slamming her door, and came over to us. "Hey" she said, tucking her hair behind her ear "where's Jess?"

I nodded toward the Texaco, where Jess was now paying. We watched as she waved good-bye to him and came out, a bag of skittles already in one hand "who wants one?" she called out, smiling as she saw Angela "Hey! God, great jacket"

"Thanks" Angela said "its new"

"Is that surprising?" Bella said sarcastically

"Is that diet?" Angela shot back, eyeing the drink in Bella's hand

"All right, all right" I said, waving my hand between them. Jessica handed me my Sprite, and I took a big sip, savoring the taste "what's the plan?"

"I have to meet Mike at Johnny Rocket's at six-thirty" Jessica said, popping another skittle in her mouth "then we'll catch up with you guys at Bendo or whatever"

"Who's at Bendo?" Angela asked

"Don't know" Jessica said "Some band. There's also a party we go to in the Arbors, Matthew has a ked somewhere, and, oh, and Alice has to dump James"

Now, everyone looked at me" not necessarily in the order" I added

"So James is out" Angela laughed, pulling a pack of gum out of her jacket pocket. She held them out to me, and I shook my head.

"So" Angela continued "what'd he do, Alice? Stand you up? Declare undying love?"

I just shook my head, knowing what was coming.

Bella grinned and said "He wore a nonmatching outfit"

"That's got to be it" said Angela

"Maybe" Jessica offered, pinching my arm "he made a major grammatical error and was fifteen minutes late"

"Oh, the horror!" Angela shrieked, and all three of them burst out laughing. I just stood there, taking it, realizing not for the first time that the only seemed to get along when ragging on me as a group.

"Funny" I finally said.

"Okay, okay" Bella said finally "how are we doing this?"

"Jess goes to meet Mike" I said "you, me, and Angela hit the Spot and then go on to Bendo. Okay?"

"Okay" Jessica said "I'll see you guys later" as she drove off, and Angela moved her car to the church parking lot next door, Bella lifted up my hand, squinting at it.

"What's this?" she asked me. I glanced down, seeing the black letters, smudged but still there, on my palm. "A phone number?"

"Its nothing" I said "just this stupid guy I met today"

"You heartbreaker" she said

We piled into Bella's car, me in front, Angela in the middle.

"The Spot?" Bella asked me as she cranked the engine. I nodded, and she put the car in reverse, backing up slowly. I reached forward and turned on the radio while Angela ate another piece of gum. As we pulled out on to the road, Bella nodded toward a big metal trash can by the gas pumps, about twenty feet away.

"Bet me?" she asked, and I craned my neck.

"Sure" I said "two bucks"

"Oh, God" Angela said, sighing loudly "now that we're out of high school, can we please move on from this?"

Bella ignored her, picking up the plastic cup, and then stuck her arm out the driver's side window. She squinted, lifted her chin, and then, in one smooth movement, threw her arm up and released the cup. We watched as it turned end over end in the air, before disappearing with a crash, in the trash can.

"Amazing" I said to Bella. She smiled at me "I never have been able to figure out how you do that"

"Can we go now?" Angela asked, annoyed.

"Like everything else" Bella said, turning out into the traffic "it's all in the wrist"

The Spot, where we always started our night, really belonged to Angela. When her dad and mom divorced back in the 5th grade, he'd left town with his new girlfriend, selling off most of the property he'd owned in town while working as a developer. He only kept on lot, out in the country past our high school, a grassy field with nothing on it but a trampoline he'd bought for Angela on her sixth birthday. Angela's mom hand banished it quick from the backyard-it didn't match her garden-and it ended up out on the land, forgotten until we were all old enough to drive and needed someplace of our own.

We always sat on the trampoline, which was set up in the middle of the pasture, with the best view of the stars and sky. It still had some good bounce to it, enough so that any sudden movement by anybody jostled the rest.

"Watch it" Angela said to Bella, her arm jerking as she tried to drink from her cup.

"Oh, settle down" Bella replied, crossing her legs and leaning back on her palms.

"It's always like this when Jess isn't here" Angela grumbled "the balance of weight gets all out of whack"

"Angela" I said "Give it a rest" I took of a sip of my Sprite, and offered it to Bella.

"Nice night" I said to her now, and she nodded "hard to believer it's all over"

"Thank God" Angela said, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand "not a second too soon, either"

"Let's drink to that" I said, and leaned forward to press my cup against hers. Then we just sat there, suddenly quiet, no noise except the birds starting up in the trees all around us.

"It's so weird" Angela finally said "that it doesn't feel different now"

"What?" I asked her

"Everything" she said "I mean, this is what we've been waiting for, right? High school's over. It's a whole new thing but it feels exactly the same."

"That's because nothing new has started yet" Bella told her. She was focused on the sky above us "by the end of the summer, then thing will feel new. Because they will"

"It sucks to wait, though" she said "I mean, for everything to begin"

There was the sound of a horn beeping, loud then fading as it passed on the road behind us. That was the nice thing about the Spot: you could hear everything, but no one could see you.

"This is just the in-between time" I said "it goes faster than you think"

"I hope so" Angela said, and I eased back on my elbows, tilting my head back to look up at the sky, which was pinkish, streaked with red and blue. This was the time we knew best, that stretch of day going from dusk to dark. It seemed like we were always waiting for nighttime here.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

By the time we got to Bendo, it was nine o'clock and I had a nice buzz on. We pulled up, parked, and eyed the bouncer standing by the door.

"Perfect" I said, pulling down the visor to check my makeup "It's Rodney"

"Where's my ID?" Angela said, digging through her jacket "God, I just had it"

"Is it in your bra?" I asked her, turning around. She blinked, stuck her hand down her shirt and came up with it. She kept everything in her bra: I.D., money, extra barrettes.

"Bingo" she said, sticking it in her front pocket

"So classy" Bella said

"Look who's talking" Angela shot back "At least I wear a bra"

"Well, at least I need one" Bella replied

Angela narrowed her eyes. She was a B cup, and a small one at that, and had always been sensitive about it "well at least-"

"Stop" I said "Let's go"

As we walked up, Rodney eyed us from where he was sitting on a stool propping the door open. Bendo was an eighteen-and-up club, but we'd been coming since sophomore year. You head to be twenty-one to drink, thought, and with out fakes Angela and I usually could get our hand stamped. Especially by Rodney.

"Alice, Alice" he said as I reached into my pocket, pulling my fake. My name, my face, my brother's birthday, so I could quote it if I had to "How's it feel to be a high school graduate?"

"I don't know what you're talking about" I said, smiling at him "you know im a junior at the university"

He hardly glanced at my ID but squeezed my hand, brushing it with his fingers as he stamped it. Disgusting "whats your major?"

"English lit" I said "but im minoring in business"

"I got some business for you" he said, taking Angela's Id and stamping her hand. She was quick though, pulling back fast, the ink smearing.

"You're an asshole" Bella told him, but he just shrugged.

"I feel so dirty" Angela said as we walked in.

"You'll feel better after you have a beer"

Bendo was crowded already. The band hadn't come on yet.

"I'll get a table" Bella called out to me, and I nodded, heading for the bar with Angela behind me. We pushed through the crowd, dodging people, until we got a decent spot by the beer taps.

I'd just hoisted myself up on my elbows, trying to wave down the bartender when I felt someone brush up against me. I tried to pull away, but it was packed where I was standing, so I just drew myself in a bit, pulling my arms against my sides. Then, very quietly, I heard a voice in my ear.

"Ah, we meet again"

I turned my head, slightly, and right there, practically on top of me, was the guy from the hospital. He was smiling at me "Oh, God" I said

"No, it's Jasper" he replied, offering my his hand, which I ignored. Instead I glanced around behind me for Angela, but saw she had been waylaid by a guy in a dark blue jacket that I dint recognize.

"Two beers!" I shouted at the bartender, who'd finally seen me.

"Make that three!" this Jasper yelled

"You are _not _with me" I said

"Well, not technically" he replied, shrugging "but that could change"

"Look" I said as the bartender dropped three plastic cups in front of my "I'm not-"

"I see you still have my number" he said, interrupting me and grabbing one of the beers. He also slapped a ten down.

"I haven't had a change to wash it off"

"Will you be impressed if I tell you I'm in a band?"

"No"

"Not at all?" he said, raising his eyebrows" God, I though chicks loved guys in bands"

"First off, im not a chick" I said, grabbing my beer "and second, I have a steadfast rule about musicians"

"Which is?"

I turned my back to him and started to elbow my way through the crowd, back to Angela "no musicians"

'I could write you a song" he offered, following me. I was moving so fast the beers I was carrying kept sloshing, but if he didn't keep right up.

"I don't want a song"

"Everybody wants a song!"

"Not me" I tapped Angela on the shoulder and she turned around. I handed her a beer and said "I'm going to find Bella"

"I'm right behind you" she replied, waggling her fingers at the guy she'd been talking to. But crazy musician boy kept after my, still talking.

"I think you like me" he decided as I stepped on somebody's foot, prompting a yelp. I kept moving.

"I really do not" I said, finally spying Bella in a corner booth head propped on one elbow, looking bored. When she saw me she held up booth hands, in a what-the-heck gesture, but I just shook my head.

"Who is this guy?" Angela called out from behind me.

"Nobody" I said

"Jasper" he replied, turning a bit to offer her his hand while stile keeping step with me "How are you?"

"Fine" she said, confused "Alice?"

"Just keep walking" I called behind me, stepping around two guys in dreadlocks "he'll lose interest eventually"

"Oh, ye of little faith" he said cheerfully "I'm just getting started"

We arrived at the booth in a pack: me, Jasper the musician, and Angela. I was out of breath, she looked confuse, but he just slide in next to Bella, offering his hand "hi" he said "I'm with them"

Bella looked at me, but I was too tired to do anything but plop into the booth "well" she said "_I'm_ with them. But I'm not with you. How is that possible?"

"Well" he said "it's actually an interesting story"

No one said anything for a minute. I groaned and said "God, you guys, now he's going to tell it"

"See" he began, leaning back into the booth "I was at the hospital today, and I saw this girl. It was an across-a-crowded-room kind of thing. A real moment, you know?"

I rolled my eyes. Angela said "and this would be Alice?"

"Right. Alice" he said, repeating my name with a smile. "Do you want to tell the next part?"

"No" I said flatly

"So" he went on, slapping the table for emphasis, making all our drinks jump "the fact is that I'm a man of impulse. Of action. So I walked up, plopped down beside her, and introduced myself"

Angela looked at me, smiling "Really?" she said

"Could you go away now?" I asked him just as the music overhead cut off and there was a tapping noise from the stage, followed by someone saying "check, check"

"Duty calls" he said standing up. He pushed his half-finished beer over to me and said "I'll see you later?"

"No"

"Okay, then! We'll talk later" and then he pushed off, into the crowed and was gone. We all just sat there for a second. I finished my beer, then closed my eyes and lifted the cup, pressing it to my temple.

"Alice" Angela finally said "you're keeping secrets"

"I'm not" I told her "it was just this stupid thing. I'd forgotten all about it"

"He talks to much" Bella decided

"I liked his shirt" Angela told her "interesting fashion sense" just then James slid in beside me in the booth "hello" he said, sliding his arm around my waist.

"I've got to go back to the house for a sec" he said now, leaning close to me ear. He moved his hand from around my waist, so it was now cupping my knee "Come with me, okay?"

I nodded, as he slid out of the booth, moving his hand off my knee and closing his fingers around me "I'll be back" I told Bella and Angela as someone brushed past, and James finally had to cease contact with me as the crowd separated us.

"Good luck" Angela said

I turned and saw James looking at me, impatient.

"Dead man walking" Bella said in a low voice, and Angela snorted

"Bye" I said, and pushed through the crowd, where James' hand was extended, waiting to take hold of me again.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

"Okay, look" I said, pushing him back "we have to talk"

"Now?"

"Now"

He sighed, then sat back on the bed, letting his head bonk against the wall "okay" he said "go ahead"

I pulled my knees up on the bed, and then fixed my tank top. "The thing is" I began "things are really starting to change for me now"

"So anyway" I continued "I've just been thinking that-"

And then the phone rang, and I lost momentum again. James grabbed it. "Hello?" then there was a bit off umm-hmming, a couple of yeahs, and he stood up, walking across the room and into his bathroom, still mumbling.

I pulled my fingers through my hair, hating that my timing seemed to be off all night long. Still listening to him talking, I closed my eyes and stretched my arms over my head, then curled my fingers down the side of the mattress closest to the wall. And I felt something.

When James finally hung up, checked himself in the mirror, and walked back into the bedroom, I was sitting there, cross legged, with a pair of red satin bikini panties spread out on the bed in front of me. He cam strolling in, all confident, and seeing them, came to a dead, lurching stop.

"Ummpthz" he said, or something like that, as he sucked in a breath surprised, then quickly steadied himself "hey, um, what-"

"What the hell" I said, my voice level. "Are these?"

"They aren't yours?"

I looked up at the ceiling, shaking my head. Like I'd wear cheap red, polyester panties.

"How long" I said

"What?"

"How long have you been sleeping with someone else?"

"It wasn't-"

"How long" I repeated, biting off the words

"I just don't-

"_How long"_

He swallowed, and for a second it was the only sound in the room. Then he said "just a couple weeks"

I sat back, pressing my fingers to my temple. God, this was just great. Now not only was I cheated on, but other people had to know, which made me a victim, which I hated most of all. Poor, poor Alice. I wanted to kill him.

"You're an asshole" I said. He was all flushed, quaky, and I realized that he might have even been a whiner or weeper, had things gone differently. Amazing. You just never know.

"Alice. Let me-"he reached forward, touching my arm, but for once, finally, I was able to do what I wanted and yank it back as if he'd burn me.

"Don't touch me" I snapped. I grabbed my jacket, knotting it around my waist, and headed for the door, feeling him stumbling behind me. I slammed door after door as I moved through the house, finally hitting the front walk with such momentum I was at the mailbox before I even realized it. I could feel him watching me from the front steps as I walked away, but he didn't call out or say anything. Not that I wanted him to, or would have reconsidered. But most guys would have at least the decency to try.

So now I was walking through this neighborhood, full-out pissed, with no car, in the middle of a Friday night. My first Friday night as a grown-up, out of high school, in the Real World. Welcome to it.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

"Where the hell have you been?" Angela asked me when I finally made it back to Bendo, with the help of City Transit, about twenty minutes later.

"You are not going to believer-"I began

"Not now" she took my arm, pulling me through the crowd and back outside, where I saw Bella in her car, and the driver's door open "we have a situation"

When I walked up to the car, I didn't even see Jessica. She was balled up in the passenger seat, clutching a wad of tissues. Her face was red and tear streaked, and she was sobbing.

"What the hell happened?" I asked yanking open the passenger door and sliding in beside her.

"Mike b-b-broke up with m-m-me" she said, he voice gulping in air "he just _d-d-dumped _me"

"Oh, my God" I said as Angela climbed into the middle seat, putting Jessica's legs on her lap. Bella already turned around facing us, looked at me and shook her head.

"When?"

Jessica took in another breath, and then burst into tears again. "I can't" she mumbled, wiping her face with a tissue "I can't e-e-even-"

"Tonight, when she picked him up from work" Angela said to me "she took him back to his house so he could take a shower and he did it there. No warning. Nothing"

"What did he say?" I asked her

"He told her" Angela said "that he needed his freedom because it was summer and high school was over and he didn't want either of them to miss and opportunities in college. He wanted to make sure that they-"

"M-m-made the most of our lives" Jess finished, wiping her eyes.

"Jerk" Bella grumbled "You're better off"

"I l-l-love him!" Jessica wailed, and I reached over, sliding my arm around her.

"It's okay" I said

"And I had no idea" she said taking in a deep breath "how could I not even have know?"

"Jess, you'll be okay" Angela said softly.

"It's like James" she sobbed, leaning into me "we were just living our lives, picking up the dry cleaning-"

"What?" Bella said

"…unaware" Jess finished "that t-t-tonight we'd be d-d-dumped"

"Speaking of" Angela said to me "how'd that go?"

"Don't ask" I said

Jessica was full-out crying now, her face buried in my shoulder now. Over Angela's head I could see Bendo was full packed "let's get out of here" I said to Bella, and she nodded "This night has sucked anyway" as we pulled out I patter her head, knowing how much it had heart. There is nothing as bad as the first time.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

Of course we had to have another round of drinks from Texaco. Then Angela left, and Bella pulled back into traffic to take me and Jess to my house.

We were almost to the turnoff to my neighborhood when Bella suddenly slowed down and said, very quietly, to me "there's Mike"

I cut my eyes to the left, and sure enough, Mike and his friends were standing around in the parking lot of the Coffee Shack. What really bugged me was that he was smiling. Jerk.

I glanced down at Jessica, but her eyes were closed, and she was listening to the radio.

"Pull in" I said to Bella. I rolled down my window "hey Jess?"

"Hmmm?" she said

"Be still, okay? Stay down"

"Okay" she said uncertainly

We chugged along. Bella said "you or me?"

"Me" I told her, taking a last sip of my drink "I need this tonight"

Bella pushed the gas a little harder.

"You ready?" she asked me

I nodded, my cup balanced in my hand. Perfect.

Bella gunned it, hard, and we were moving. By the time Mike looked over at us, it was too late. It wasn't my best. But it wasn't bad either. It hit him square in the back of the head, spilling Sprite and ice in a wave down his back.

"Goddammit!" he yelled after us as we blew past "Jessica! Dammit! Alice!"

He was still yelling when I lost sight of him.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

After a sleeve and a half of Oreos, four cans of soda, and enough Kleenex to pad the world, I finally got Jessica to go to sleep. She was out instantly, breathing through her nose, legs tangled around my comforter.

I got a blanket, one pillow, and went into my closet, where I stretched out across the floor. I could see her from where I was, and made sure she was still sleeping soundly as I pushed aside the stack of shoe boxes I kept in the far right corner and pulled out the bundle I kept there, hidden away.

I'd had such a bad night. I didn't do this all the time, but some nights I just needed it. Nobody knew.

I curled up, pulling the blanket over me, and opened the folded towel, taking out my portable CD player and headphones. Then I slipped them on, turned off the light, and skipped to track eight. There was a skylight in my closet. Sometimes I could even see stars.

The song starts slowly. A bit of guitar, just a few cords. Then a voice, one I knew so well. The words I knew by heart. They did mean something to me. Nobody had to know. But they did.

_This lullaby is only a few words_

_A simple run of cords_

_Quiet here in this spare room_

_But you can hear it, hear it_

_Wherever you may go_

_I will let you down_

_But this lullaby plays on…_

I'd fall asleep to it, to his voice. I always did. Every time.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

**Wow that was the longest I ever wrote.**

**Anyways plz, plz comment!!!**

**I didn't write the song its in the book, just so you know.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey guys thanks for the comments!!! Keep commenting plz, it means a lot to me.**

**Disclaimer: don't own anything!!!**

**-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-**

"Aiiieeeeeee!"

"Mother of pearl!"

"Oh, suuuuugggaaarrr!!!!"

In the waiting room, the two ladies on deck for manicures looked at each other, then at me.

"Bikini wax" I explained

"Oh" said one, and went back to her magazine. The other just sat there, ears perked like a hunting hound, waiting for the next shriek. It wasn't long before Mrs. Johns, enduring her monthly appointment, delivered.

"H-E-double-hockey-sticks" Mrs. Johns was the wife of one of the local ministers, and loved God almost as much as having a smooth, hairless body. In the year I'd worked at Ambiance Salon, I'd heard more cussing from the back room where Judy worked her wax strips than all the other rooms combined.

Not that Ambiance Salon was a bad place. It was just that you couldn't please everyone, especially women, when it came to their looks.

Now, the phone rang as Mrs. Johns emerged from the waxing room. At first I'd been startled by how bad people looked right afterward: like war victims, or people who were in a fire. She was walking stiffly as she came up to my desk.

"Ambiance salon" I said into the phone "Alice speaking"

"Alice, hello, this is Chloe Williams" the woman on the other end said in a rushed voice "oh, you just have to fit me in for manicure today. Paul's got some big client and we're going to La Push and this week I restripped the coffee table and my hands are just-"

"One second please" I said, im my clipped, oh-so-professional voice, and hit the hold button. Above me, Mrs. Johns grimaced as she pulled out her walled, sliding a silver credit card across to me "that's seventy-eight, ma'am"

She nodded, and I swiped the card, handing it back to her. Her face was so red, the area around her eyebrows were practically raw. Ouch. She signed the slip, and then glanced at herself in the mirror behind me, making a face.

"Oh, goodness" she said "I guess I can't go to the post office looking like this"

"Nonsense!" Julie, the waxer, said as she breezed in, just to make sure Mrs. Johns' tip was big enough and made it into her envelope "no one will even notice. I'll see you next month, Okay?"

Mrs. Johns waggled her fingers, then walked out the door, still moving stiffly. Once she hit the curb Julie grabbed her envelope, leafed through the bills there, and made an hmmph kind of noise before flopping in a chair and crossing her legs to await her next appointment.

"Moving on" I said, hitting the button on line one. I could her Mrs. Williams panting before I even started talking "let's see, I could squeeze you in at three-thirty, but you have to be here right on the dot, because Lauren's got a firm four o'clock"

"Three-thirty?" Mrs. Williams said "well, you see, earlier would be better, because I have this-"

"Three-thirty" I repeated, tapping the desk "take it or leave it"

There was a pause, some anxious breathing, and then she said "I'll be there"

"Okay. We'll see you then"

As I hung up the phone, penciling her in, Julie looked at me and said "Alicegirl, you are such a hard-ass" I shrugged.

In the next hour I got the two women waiting for their manicures, ordered lunch for Lily, did the receipts from the day before, and between two eyebrow waxings and an underarm job I heard every gory detail about Julie's most recent disastrous blind date. But by two o'clock, things had slowed down a bit and I was just sitting there at the desk, drinking a sprite and staring out at the parking lot.

As I was staring out, I saw a beat-up white van pull into the parking lot, taking a space by Dogs gone Wild. The front and side doors of the van opened and three guys got out, all about my age, all in dress shirts and ties and jeans. They huddle for a second, discussing something, then split up, each heading into a different store. A short guy with brown curly hair came towards us, tucking in his shirt as he got closer.

"Oh boy" I said "here come the Mormons(no offense if you're Mormon)" I took a sip of my Sprite, readying myself as the door chime clanged and he came in.

"Hello" he said, walking right up

"Hello" I said "can I help you?"

"I was wondering if perhaps your were hiring?"

I looked at him. No men worked at Ambiance Salon. We had one male stylist, Eric, but he'd jumped to our biggest competition, Sunset Boulevard Salon.

"Nope" I said "we're not"

"You're sure?"

"Positive"

He didn't seem convinced, but he was still smiling "I wonder" he said, all charming "if perhaps I could fill out an application in case an opening became available?"

"Sure" I said, pulling open the bottom drawer of the desk, where we kept the pad of applications. I ripped one off, handed it to him, along with one of my pens.

"Thanks so much" he said, taking a seat in the corner by the window. I watched from where I was as he wrote his name across the top in neat block letters, then wrinkled his brow, contemplating the questions.

"Alice" Lily called out, walking into the waiting area "did we ever get that shipment from bumble bumble?"

"Not yet" I told her. Now, she glanced over at the guy in the corner.

"Why are you here?" she asked him

He looked up, hardly startled "applying for a job" he told her

She looked him up and down "is that a clip-on tie?"

"Yes, ma'am" he said, nodding at her "it sure is"

Lily looked at me, then back at him, then burst into laughter "oh, Lord, look at this boy. And you want to work for me?"

"Yes, ma'am, I sure do" he was so polite I could see him gaining points, quickly. Lily was big on respect.

"Can you give a manicure?"

He considered this "no. But I'm a fast learner"

"Can you bikini wax?"

"Nope"

"Cut hair?"

"No, I sure can't"

She cocked her head to the side, smiling at her "Honey" she finally said "you're useless"

He nodded "my mother always said that" he told her "but I'm in this band and we all have to get jobs today, so I'm trying anything"

Lily laughed again. "You're in a band?"

"Yes, ma'am. We just came down from Texas, for the summer. And we all have to get jobs, so we came here and split up"

So they're not Mormons, I thought. They're musicians. Even worse.

"What do you play?" Lily asked

"Drums"

"Like Ringo?"

"Exactly" he grinned, then added, in a lower voice "you know they always but curly haired guys in the back. Otherwise all the ladies would be on me"

Lily exploded in laughter, so loudly that Julie and on of the manicurists, Lauren, poked their heads around the corner.

"What in the world?" Lauren asked

"Good God, is that a clip-on tie?" Julie said

"Look" Lily said, catching her breath "we've got nothing for you hear. But you come down to the coffee place with me and I'll get you a job. That girl owes me a favor"

"Really?"

She nodded "but come on. I don't have all day"

He leapt up, the pen he was holding clattering to the floor. He bent down to get it, then brought the application back to me. "Thanks anyway" he said

"No problem"

"Let's go, Ringo!" Lily yelled from the door

He jumped, grinning, then leaned a little closer and said to me "you know, he's still talking about you"

"Who is?"

"Jasper"

Of course. Just my luck. He's not just in a band, he's in that band "why?" I said "he doesn't even know me"

"Doesn't matter" he said, shrugging "you're officially a challenge. He'll never give up now."

I just sat there, shaking my head. Ridiculous.

He didn't seem to notice, instead just patted his hand on the desk, before walking over to Lily.

Once they'd left, Julie looked at me "you know him?" she asked

"No" I said, grabbing the phone as it rang again. Small world, small town. "I don't"

In the week since James and I had split, I'd hardly thought about him or Jasper the musician or anything else other than my mother's wedding. It was a distraction I needed, not that I'd ever admit it aloud.

James had called a bunch, at first, but after a while he just stopped, knowing I'd never get back to him. Angela pointed out that I'd gotten what I wanted, really: my freedom. Just no exactly the way I wanted it.

Luckily, I had Jessica to deal with too. She'd spent the last week completely in denial; sure Mike would change his mind.

And now, the wedding was here. I got off work early, at five, and drove home to get ready for the rehearsal dinner. As I walked up to the front door, I realized the house was just as I'd left it. In chaos.

"But there's just no way they'll get here in time!" my mother was shrieking as I walked in and dropped my keys on the table "they're suppose to be here in an hour or we wont be able to make the dinner!"

"Mom" I called out "Calm down"

"I understand that" she said "but this is my wedding!"

I glanced into the living room, which was empty except for Rosalie, already dressed for the dinner, sitting on the couch watching TV about some car show. She glanced up at me, smiling,

"What's going on?" I said

"The limo service is having some problems" she fluffed her hair "it seems one of their cars was in an accident and the other is stuck in traffic"

"That's just not acceptable!" my mother yelled

"Where's Emmett?"

She looked up at the ceiling "in his room" she said, then turning her attention back to the TV.

"I understand that" my mother said, her voice now wavering close to tears "but what you're not hearing is that I have a hundred people that are going to be waiting for me at the Loews Santa Monica Beach Hotel and I will not be there!"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa" I said, coming up behind her and gently closing my hand over the phone "Mom. Let me talk to them"

"It's just ludicrous!" she sputtered, but she let me take it "it's-"

"Mom" I said quietly "go finish getting dressed. I'll handle this. Okay?"

She just stood there for a second, blinking. She already had on her dress and was carrying her shoes in her hand. No makeup, no jewelry.

"Well, okay" she said "I'll be upstairs"

"Right" I watched as she walked out of the room, brushing her fingers through her hair. When she was gone, I put the phone to my ear "is this Larry?"

"No" the voice said "this is Kyle"

"Is Larry there?"

"Hold on" there was a muffled noise, someone's hand covering the receiver. Then

"Hello, Larry speaking"

"Larry, this is Alice Cullen"

"Hey, Alice! Look, this thing with the cars is just messed up, okay?"

"My mother is approaching meltdown, Larry"

"I know, I know. But look, this is what Kyle was trying to tell her. What we'll do is…"

Five minutes later, I went up the stairs and knocked on my mother's door. When I came in, she was sitting in front of her vanity. She looked no different except that she had changed her dressed.

"All fixed" I told her "a car will be here at six. It's a town car, not a limo, but we're set for tomorrow and that's what really matters. Okay?"

She sighed, placing one hand over her chest "wonderful. Thank you"

I sat down on her bed, kicking off my shoes, and glanced at the clock. It was five-fifteen. I could be ready in thirty minutes flat, including drying my hair, so I lay back and closed my eyes.

"Alice, honey" she said suddenly, and I jerked up, realizing I'd almost fallen asleep "can you come do my clasp?"

I stood up and walked over to where she was sitting, taking the necklace she handed me "you look beautiful" I told her. It was true. Tonight, she was wearing a long white dress with a drop neckline, and the medium-sized diamond ring Carlisle gave her.

"Thank you, sweetheart" she said as I did the clasp.

Now, she turned around took my hands in hers "oh, Alice" she said, smiling" can you believe this? We're going to be so happy"

I nodded

"I mean" she said, turning around "it's not like this it my first time going down the aisle"

"Nope" I agreed, smoothing her hair down where it was poking out.

"But it just feels real this time. Permanent. Don't you think?"

She was still smiling at me in the mirror. Sometimes I thought if she could read my mind it would kill her. Or both of us.

"Different" she said, convincing herself "it's different this time"

"Sure, Mom" I said, putting my hands on her shoulders. They felt small to me, somehow, from where I stood "sure it is"

On my way down to my room, Emmett jumped out at me.

"Alice! Help me!" he said, holding his tie in one hand.

I grabbed the tie from his hands and started tying it. I smiled "You look great" I said, patting the tie down.

"Thanks" he said, smiling, then pulling me into a hug.

"Em, I need to get ready" I said

"Oh, right" he said, quickly letting go of me.

I laughed then headed to my room to get ready.

**-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-**

**Crappy ending, I know.**

**I think the wedding is next…yeah it is. Pretty sure. Anyways! Plz comment and tell me what you think, plz? :D**

**AND my mom and dad are going on some stupid work thing for a couple days, and their leaving me and my sibling with a babysitter or their friend, whatever, anyways i wont be able to upload cuz of that. but i promise i will try to work on it and get it up like Wednesday or Thursday!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Heyyy!!! Ok so I didn't really explain the story a lot, but um Edward and Bella are not dating, they don't know each other. Edward is in the band with Jasper and Bella is Alice's best friend as you know so yea!**

**Disclaimer: don't own anything**

**On with the story!!!**

**-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-**

"And finally, please lift your glasses and toast Esme's daughter, Alice, who planned and organized this entire event. We couldn't have done it without her. To Alice!"

"To Alice!" everyone echoed, glancing at me before drinking more of their champagne.

"And now" my mother said, smiling at Carlisle "please enjoy yourselves!"

The string quartet began playing, my mother and Carlisle kissed, and I finally let out a breath. The salads had been served, everyone seated. Cake: check. Table centerpieces: check. Bartender and liquor: check. This and a million other details completed mean that now, after six months, two days, and approximately four hours, I could relax. At least for a few minutes.

"Okay" I said to Angela "now I will have some champagne"

"Finally!" she said, pushing a glass at me. She and Jessica were past tipsy, red faced and giggly enough to have attracted attention to our table more than once already. Rosalie, who was sitting on my left with Emmett, was drinking some champagne and watching us, a pinched look on her face.

"Good job, Alice" Emmett said, spearing tomato from his salad and stuffing it in his mouth "you really made this a good day for mom"

"After this" I told him "she's on her own, she can go to Vegas and get married by an Elvis impersonator. I'm out"

Rosalie let her mouth drop open "next time?" she said, shocked. She looked over at my mother and Carlisle, who were now at the head table "Alice, this is marriage. In front of God. Its forever"

Emmett and I just looked at her. Across the table Jessica burped.

"Oh my God" she said as Angela began snorting with laughter "excuse me"

Rosalie just rolled her eyes, clearly offended at sharing a table with a bunch of peons and cynics "Emmett" she said "let's get some air"

"But I'm eating my salad" Emmett said.

Rosalie finished her salad already and signaled to the server she was done.

"Sure" Emmett said, standing up "air. Let's go"

Once they were gone, Angela hopped over two seats, with Jessica following behind her clumsily. Bella was missing, having to stay home with her dad until he left for work. Quiet as she was, I always felt things were out of balance when she wasn't around, as if Jessica and Angela were too much for me to handle alone.

"Man" Jessica said as Rosalie led Emmett out into the lobby, talking the whole way "she hates us"

"No" I said, taking another sip of my champagne "she just hates me"

"Oh, stop" Angela said, picking through her salad.

"Why would she hate you?" Jessica asked as tipped up her glass again.

"Because she thinks I'm a bad person" I told her "I go against everything she believes in"

"But that's not true!" she said, offended "you're a _wonderful _person, Alice"

Angela snorted "now, let's not get crazy"

"She is!" Jessica said, loud enough so that a couple of people at the next table glanced over at us.

"I'm not wonderful" I said, squeezing Jessica's arm "but I am better than I used to be"

"That" Angela said, tossing her napkin down on her plate "I can agree with"

"Right" I agreed

Jessica nodded

"And finally" I said, finishing my drink "I don't sleep around nearly as much as I used to" (not in a bad way, just like sleeping in)

"Here, Here" Angela said, lifting up her glass "Watch out Princeton" she said, smiling at me "Alice is practically a saint now"

"St. Alice" I said, trying it out "I think I like that"

The dinner was good. No one else seemed to think the chicken was a little rubbery besides me, but then I'd lobbied hard for the beef and lost, so I might have just been sore. Rosalie and Emmett never returned to our table. Rosalie was talking away to the town manager, waving her fork as she made a point, while Emmett sat beside her, shoveling food in his mouth. When he saw me he smiled, apologetically, and just shrugged as if this, like so many other things, were completely out of his hands.

Meanwhile, at our table, the champagne was flowing. One of Carlisle's nephews was busy hitting on Angela, while Jessica, in the ten minutes I'd been gone, had crossed over from happily buzzing to completely maudlin.

"The thing is" she said, leaning into me "I really thought that Mike and I would get married. I mean, I did"

"I know" I said, feeling relieved as I saw Bella, in one of her few dresses, heading towards us. She looked uncomfortable, as she always did in anything but jeans, and as she sat down she made a face.

"Pantyhose" she grumbled "stupid things cost me four bucks and feel like freaking sandpaper"

"Well, if it isn't Isabella" Angela said her voice high and giggles "don't you own any dresses from this decade?"

"Bite me" Bella told her, and Carlisle's nephew raised his eyebrows. Angela, hardly bothered, went back to her champagne and some long story she'd been telling about herself.

"Bella" Jessica whispered, falling off my shoulder and onto hers, her head nudging Bella's ear "I'm drunk"

"I see that" Bella said flatly, pushing her back to me "Gosh" she said brightly "I'm so glad I came!"

"Don't be like that" I told her "are you hungry?"

"I had some soup at home" she said, squinting at the centerpiece.

"Stay here" I stood up, easing Jessica back against her own chair "I'll be right back"

I was just on my way back to the table, plate of chicken and asparagus and pilaf hand, when I heard the microphone up front crackle, a few guitar chords jangling behind it.

"Hi everyone" a voice said as I ducked between two tables, sidestepping a server clearing plates "we're All Time Low, and we'd like to wish Carlisle and Esme the best of happiness together!"

As everyone applauded this, I stopped where I was standing then turned my head. Carlisle had insisted on handling the band, claiming he knew someone who owed him a favor. But now, I wished more than anything that I'd just hired the other band,

Because of course it was Jasper, the musician boy, standing in front of the microphone in a black suit that looked a size too big. He said "what do you say, folks? Let's get this part going!"

"Oh, my God" I said, as the band started playing. I went back to the table and gave Bella her plate, then flopped down into my seat. Jessica, as I'd expect, was now teary-eyed, dabbing her face with a napkin while Bella patted her leg. Angela and the nephew were gone.

"I don't believe this" I said

"Believe what?" Bella said, picking up her fork "Man, this smells great"

"The band-"I began, but the was a far as I got before Rosalie appeared behind me, Emmett in tow

"Mom's asking for you" Emmett said

"What?"

"You're supposed to be dancing" Rosalie informed me, gently nudging me out of my seat "the rest of the wedding party is already up there"

"Oh, come on" I said, looking at the dance floor, where of course my mother was staring at me, smiling and waggling her fingers in that come-here-now kind of way. So I grabbed Jessica up with one arm and dragged her with me, through the maze of tables, and into the crowd.

"I don't feel like dancing" she sniffled

"Neither do I" she snapped

"Oh, Alice, Jessica!" my mother shrieked as we came closer, reaching out her arms to pull us both in close. "Isn't this just so fun?"

We were right in the middle of the crowd, people dancing all around us. Carlisle who had been dancing with my mother, now grabbed my arm and spun me out, hurling me into a couple doing the bump. I almost felt my arm disconnect from my body before he yanked me back.

"Oh, Lord" Jessica said from behind me, having seen this. But then I was flying out again, this time in the opposite direction. I kept trying to send he back to my mother, but she was distracted dancing with one of Carlisle's little nephews.

"Help me" I hissed at Jessica as I whizzed past her, Carlisle's hand still clamping my wrist. Then he pulled me close for a weird, jitterbug kind of hopping that made my teeth knock together, but not enough to distract me from seeing Angela, who was standing off to the side of the dance floor, laughing hysterically.

"You're a great dancer!" Carlisle said, pulling me in close and spinning me around more "I love to dance" Carlisle yelled at me, throwing me out into another spin "I don't get to do it enough!"

"I think you do" I grumbled, as the song finally began to wind down.

"What's that?" he said, cupping his hand over his ear.

"I said" I told him "that you can really move"

He laughed, wiping his face "you too" he said, as the band finished the song "you too"

I escaped as everyone was applauding, pushing my way to the bar, where my brother was standing nibbling on a piece of bread, alone for once.

"What was that?" he said, laughing "God, it looked like some wild tribal ritual"

"Shut up" I said

"And now, folks" I heard Jasper say from the stage as the lights dimmed a bit "for your listening pleasure…a little slow song"

The opening strains of "After Tonight" began, a bit clumsily, and people who'd been avoiding the dance floor during the faster numbers started getting up from their chairs and pairing off. Rosalie appeared next to me, smiling at Emmett, and sliding her fingers over Emmett's.

"Come on" she murmured. Whatever I felt for her personally, I had to admire her technique. _Nothing _stopped this girl. "Let's dance"

"Absolutely" Emmett agreed, and wiped his mouth as he followed her, glancing back at me as they reached the dance floor "you okay?"

I nodded "Fine" I said. The room had grown quieter as the music did, people's voices more hushed as they moved together. Onstage, Jasper sand while the keyboardist looked bored, glancing at his watch. I could relate.

What was it about slow dancing anyway? Even in junior high I'd hated the moment the music stalled, screeching a halt so someone could press their sweaty body to yours. At least with real dancing you weren't trapped, forced to rock back and forth with a total stranger. What a bunch of crap.

And it was crap. Totally. Because all slow dancing was really only about getting close to someone you wanted close or being forced to someone you wished was far, far away. Okay, so my brother and Rosalie looked totally smitten, and yeah, okay, the words to the song were nice and romantic. I mean, it wasn't a bad song or anything. It just wasn't my thing.

I grabbed a glass of champagne off a passing tray, taking a sip and wincing as the bubbles worked their way up to my nose. I was fighting off a couching fit when I felt someone come up beside me. I glanced over to see a girl who worked with Carlisle- her name was Katie, or Judie, something with an _ie_ at the end. She smiled at me.

"I love this song" she said, sighing "don't you?"

I shrugged "I guess" I said as Jasper leaned into the microphone, closing his eyes.

"They look so happy" she went on, and I followed her gaze to my mother and Carlisle, who were laughing and doing spins as the song wound down. She sniffled, and I realized she was near tears. "He's really happy, isn't he?"

"Yeah" I said "he is"

she wiped her eyes, then waved her hand at me "oh, dear" she said "forgive me. I just-"

"I know" I said

Finally the last verse came to and end. Katie/Judie took a deep breath, blinking as the lights came up again.

"I should…" she said shakily, touching her face "I need to freshen up"

"Good to see you" I told her

"You, too" she said, and then left to the bathroom

Enough, I thought. I need a break

I walked past the cake table and out a side door to the parking lot. Inside, the band stopped playing, to scattered applause. Then the canned hotel music came on, and a few seconds later a door farther down the wall banged open and out came All Time Low, their loud voices.

"This is of the suck" the guitar player said "after this, no more weddings. I'm serious"

"It's money" Ringo the drummer said

"Not this one" the keyboard guy muttered "this is a gimme"

"No" Jasper said, running a hand through his hair "this is the bail money. Or have we all forgotten that? We owed Carlisle, remember?"

There was a grumbling from everyone; followed by silence "I hate doing covers" the guitarist finally said "I don't see why we can't do our own stuff"

"For this crowd?" Jasper said "Be serious. I don't think Uncle Miltie from Saginaw wants to dance to your various versions of 'The Potato Song'."

"Its not called that" Edward snapped "and you know it"

"Settle" the drummer said "it's only a couple more hours, okay? Let's just make the best of it. At least we get to eat"

"We get to eat?" Edward, the keyboardist said "Seriously?"

"That's what Carlisle said" the drummer replied "If there's enough left over. How much longer of a break do we have?"

Jasper glanced at his watch "ten minutes"

The keyboardist looked at the drummer, then the guitarist "I say food. Food?"

"Food" they replied in unison. Edward said "you in, Jasper?"

"Nah. Just nab me some bread or something"

"Okay, Gandhi" Ringo said, and somebody snorted "we'll see you in there"

They all turned around and went inside, the door slamming shut behind them.

I sat there, watching him, knowing for once he couldn't see me first. he was just sitting there on the wall, drumming his fingers. I'd always been a sucker for blonde boys, and from a distance his suit didn't look so tacky: he was almost cute. And tall. Tall was good.

I stood up and brushed my hands through my hair. Okay, so maybe he was really annoying. And hated they way he'd bumped me against the wall. But I was here now, and it seemed only fitting that I take a few steps toward him, show myself, I only to throw him off a bit.

I was about to come around the Dumpster and into full sight when the door opened and two girls came out. they were younger than me, by and couple of years.

"I told you he'd be out here!" one of them, the brunette said to the other. Then they both giggled. The taller one was hanging back, hand on the door, but her sister walked right up; plopping down beside Jasper "we were looking for you"

"Really" Jasper said, and smiled politely "Well, hello"

"Hello yourself" the brunette said, and I made a face, in the dark.

"Do you have a girlfriend?" the brunette said abruptly

"Emily!" her sister hissed "God!"

"I'm just asking" Emily said, sliding a little closer to Jasper "it's just a question"

"Well" Jasper said "actually…"

And at that, I turned around and headed back the way I'd come. Back inside, the cake was out on the dance floor, with my mother and Carlisle posing beside it, their hands intertwined over the cake knife as the photographed moved all around them. I stood on the edge of the crowd, watching as Carlisle fed my mother a piece of cake.

The rest of the night went pretty much as I expected. My mother and Carlisle left in a shower of birdseed and bubbles, Angela ended up making out with Carlisle's nephew in the lobby, and Bella and I got stuck in the bathroom, holding back Jessica's hair.

"Don't you just love weddings?" Bella asked me, passing over another wad of wet paper towels, which I pressed against Jessica's forehead as she stood up.

"I do" Jessica wailed, missing the sarcasm. "I really, really do"

Bella rolled her eyes at me, but I just shook my head as I led Jessica out of the stall and to the sinks "this has to be the worst time of my life" she moaned, blinking at herself.

"Now, now" I told her, taking her hand "you'll feel better tomorrow"

"No, you wont" Bella said, getting the door "tomorrow, you'll have a wicked hangover and feel even worse"

"Bells" I said

"But the next day" she went on "the next day you'll feel much better. You'll see"

So we were a bedraggled bunch as we made our way out into the lobby, with Jessica held up between us. It was one in the morning, my hair was flat, and my feet hurt.

"Where's Angela?" I asked Bella as we struggled through the revolving doors.

"No idea. Last I saw her she was all over what's-his-bucket back there by the piano"

I glanced behind me into the lobby, but no Angela. She always seemed to be elsewhere when anyone else was puking.

"She's a big girl" Bella told me "She'll be fine"

We were hoisting Jessica into Bella's front seat when there was a rattling noise, and the white van I now recognized as belonging to Jasper's band pulled up in front of the hotel. The back doors popped open and out jumped Ringo and the guitarist hopping from the driver's seat and following him. Then they disappeared inside, leaving the engine running.

"You need a ride?" Bella asked me

"Nope. Emmett is there waiting for me" I shut the door "thanks for this"

"No problem" she pulled her keys out of her pocket "it went okay, don't you think?"

I shrugged "It's over" I said "that's all that matters"

As she drove off, beeping the horn once, I started back to the hotel to find my brother. When I passed the white van, Ringo and the guitarist were coming back out, hauling equipment and bickering.

"Edward never helps" the guitarist said, hoisting some big speaker into the back of the van "this vanishing act is getting old, you know?"

"Let's just get out of here" Ringo replied "where's Jasper?"

"They get five minutes" the guitarist said "then they can walk" then he reached in the open driver's-side window and planted his palm on the horn, letting it blare out, loud, for a good five seconds.

"Oh, good" Ringo said sarcastically "that'll go over well"

A few seconds later the keyboardist-Edward-came out the revolving doors, looking irritated.

"Nice" he yelled, coming around the van "real classy"

"Get in or walk home" the guitarist snapped "I mean it"

Edward got in, the horn sound one more time, and then they waited. No Jasper. Finally, after what seemed like a bit of bickering from the front seats, the van chugged away, taking a right onto the main road.

Back in the hotel, the cleaning crew was at work on the reception hall, clearing glasses and pulling off tablecloths.

"They left you" I heard someone say. I turned around. Jasper. God help me. He was sitting at a table next to the ice sculpture with a plate in front of him.

"Who did?" I asked

"Emmett and Rosalie" he replied, as if he'd known them forever. Then he picked up a fork, taking a bite of whatever he was having.

"What?" I said "they left?"

"They were tired" he chewed for a second, then swallowed. "Rosalie said she had to go because she had to go to work early tomorrow."

I just looked at him.

"Anyway" he went on "I said it was fine, because when you showed up we'd just give you a ride"

"We" I repeated

"Me and the guys"

I considered this. And I'd been so close to being scot-free home by now care of Bella. Great. "They're gone too" I said finally

He looked up, his fork midway to his mouth "they what?"

"They left" I repeated slowly "they beeped the horn first"

"Oh, man, I thought I heard the horn" he said, shaking his head "typical"

I looked around the mostly empty room, as if a solution to this and all my other problems might be lurking behind, say, a potted plant. No luck. So I did what seemed, by now, inevitable. I walked over to the table where he was sitting, pulled out a chair, and sat down.

"Ah" he said, with a smiled "Finally, she comes around"

"Don't get too excited" I said. I felt tired in every part of my body, as if I'd been stretched thin. "I'm just getting the energy to call a cab"

"You should try some of this cake first" he pushed the plate at me "here"

"I don't want any cake"

"It's really good. It doesn't taste chalky at all"

"I'm sure it doesn't" I said "but, I'm fine"

"You probably didn't even get any, right" he wiggled the fork at me "just try it"

"No" I said flatly

"Come one"

"No"

"Mmmm" he poked at it with the fork "so tasty"

"You" I said finally "are really pissing me off"

He shrugged, as if he'd heard this before, and then pulled the plate back toward himself.

Jasper put down the fork and pushed the plate away "So" he said, looking at me "this your mom's first remarriage?"

"Fourth" I said "she's made a career of it"

"Got you beat" he told me "My mom's on her fifth"

I had to admit, I was impressed. So far I'd never met anymore with more ex-steps then me "Really"

He nodded "But you know" he said sarcastically "I really think this one's going to last"

"Hope springs eternal"

He sighed "especially in my mom's house"

"Jasper, honey" someone called out from behind me "did you get enough to eat?"

He sat up, then raised his voice and said "Yes, ma'am, I sure did. Thank you"

"There's a bit more of this chicken dish left"

"No, Jill. I'm full. Really"

"Okay then"

I looked at him "Do you know everybody?"

He shrugged "not everybody" he said "I just bond easily. It's part of the whole repeating-stepfather thing. It makes you more mellow"

"Yeah, right" I said

"Because you have to just go with the flow. Your life is not your own, with people coming in and out all the time. You got mellow because you have to. I mean, you know exactly what I'm saying, I bet"

"Oh, yes" I said flatly "I am just so easygoing. That is precisely the word that describes me"

"Isn't it?"

"No" I told him "it isn't" and then I stood up and got my bad, feeling my feet ache as they settled into my shoes "I have to go home now"

He got to his feet, taking his jacket off the back of the chair "Share a cab?"

"I don't think so"

"All right" he said shrugging "suit yourself"

I walked to the door, thinking he'd be behind me, but when I glanced back he was across the room, going out the other way. I had to admit I was surprised that he had given up already.

There was a cab parked out front, the driver dozing. I climbed into the backseat, sliding off my shoes. It was, by the green numbers on the dashboard, exactly 2 A.M. As the cab turned onto the main road, I saw a glint of something through the park, over to my right. It was Jasper, on foot, turning into the neighborhood. He was walking down the middle of the street. And watching him head home, for a second it was like he was the only one awake or even alive in the entire world right then, except for me.

**-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-**

**Ok sorry it took so long, but I have some stupid project due Friday and it's really stupid and pointless so I'll try and get the next one up! ok and if you guys have read the story 'This Lullaby' then you know whats going to happen. so im going to change it around a bit and if you have any ideas will you plz tell me them? it would help a lot. **

**Plz, plz, plz R&R**


	5. Chapter 5

**Well I haven't updated this story in like what, 4 months? And I'm so, so, so, so sorry!!!!!!! I have been so busy it's not even funny. I had track forever and it finally ended and then core testing which is lame and then grades are due soon, it sucks. **

**And most of you were asking about Bella and Edward, they're not really like a couple in this one, but Edward and Bella are both in this story. And maybe I'll try to get them to know each other. I'm gonna make a story of them soon…hopefully. It's more of an Alice and Jasper story. ANYWAYS, on with the story.**

**I don't own anything.**

**-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-**

**APOV**

"Alice, really. He's wonderful."

"Lily, please."

"I know what you're thinking. I do. But this is different. I wouldn't do you like that. Don't you trust me?"

I put down the stack of papers I'd been going through and looked up at her. She was leaning on her elbow.

"I don't do blind dates" I told her, again.

"It isn't blind, sweetheart, I know him" she explained. "A nice boy. He's got great hair, too."

"What?" I said

She tugged on her hair as if I needed a visual aid for this basic fact "Hair. I noticed the other day, when he came in."

I blinked, trying to process the connection between these two. Nope. Nothing.

"Lily?" a voice called out. "My scalp is burning?"

"That's just the dye working" Lily called back, not even turning to look. "Anyway, Alice, I really talked you up. And since his mother is coming back this afternoon for-"

"No" I said flatly "Forget it."

"But he's perfect!"

"Nobody" I told her "is perfect"

"Lily?" the voice sounded nervous "it's really hurting…"

"You want to find love, Alice?"

"No"

"I don't understand you, girl! You're about to make a big mistake."

"Lily!" the woman, now shrieking "I think I smell burning hair-"

"Oh, for God's Sake!" Lily yelled and whirled around, stomping out of the room. I sighed, pulling out my calendar. Today was Monday. My mother and Carlisle would be back from their honeymoon in three days.

The chimes over the door sounded and the UPS man came in, carrying a box, which he put on the desk. "Package for you, Alice" he said.

"Okay" I said. The envelope wasn't stamped or sealed. I opened the flap and reached in, pulling out a stack of t here pictures. They were all of the same couple, both in there seventies. The man had on a baseball hat and a T-shirt that read _Will Gold for Food_. The woman had a camera strapped to her belt and was wearing flip-flops. They had their arms around each other and looked really happy.

Which was all fine, except who the hell were they? And what was this supposed to mean, anyway? I stood up, looking for the UPS man but he was gone. Was I supposed to know these people? I glanced back at the pictures, offering no explanation.

"Alice, sweetie, get me some cold water, would you?" Lily yelled from the other room.

"Sure thing!" I yelled back, shoving the pictures in my purse.

Three hours later, when the drama had finally stopped and Lily's customer had left with a bandaged scalp, a hefty gift, and a written promise of eyebrow waxing for life, I finally locked the cash drawer, got my purse, and walked outside.

I got in my car, cranked the engine, and turned the AC on full blast. Then I picked up my phone and checked my messages. One from Bella, asking what were doing tomorrow. One from Jessica saying she was fine. And lastly my brother, Emmett, reminding me that Rosalie was cooking dinner tonight, six sharp, don't be late.

I deleted the last message, angrily.

I was interrupted by a thwacking sound as something hit my window. I looked up, heart jumping, and saw yet another snapshot of the old couple.

I hit the button for my window and it went down. Standing right there was Jasper. He was wearing a blue shirt with worn out jeans.

"You're stalking me" I told him

"What?" he said "you didn't like the pictures?"

"Will Golf for Food? How stupid is that?" I said, putting my car in reverse "is it supposed to mean something?"

"No musicians, no golfers" he said. "What's left? Lion tamers?"

I just looked at him, and then put my foot on the gas. He had to jump out of the way to avoid my tire flattening his foot.

"Wait" he said, putting his hand on my window "Can I get a ride? We have a band meeting in fifteen minutes. And I can't be late."

"I'm going to be late, too" I said. I wasn't a freaking taxi service.

"Please" he squatted down, so we were eye to eye

"One ride" I told him "that's it."

He smiled, ran around the car, and got in the passenger seat. "Thanks" he said, reaching for his seat belt.

"Take this left here" he pointed, and I changed lanes.

"So why are you so moody?" he asked

"I am not moody" I told him

"Please" he snorted "every time I try to talk to you, you act like I did something to you"

I took a deep breath, ignoring him.

"Left here" he said.

"Which house is it?"

He looked out the window, completely ignoring me.

Then I saw the white van, parked in the front yard of a white little house.

"Finally" the drummer said. I put the car in reverse.

"It's not six, yet" Jasper said, reaching down to pet a dog.

"Yeah, but I don't have my key" he said, standing up

"Neither do I" Jasper told him "What about the back door?"

"Locked. Plus you know Edward moved that bookcase in front of the door last night"

Jasper sighed "Well, I guess we just have to break a window"

"What?" the drummer said

"Don't panic" Jasper said "We'll pick a small one. Then you can wiggle through"

"No way" the drummer said, crossing his arms over his chest "why do I always have to do the stupid shit, anyway?"

"Because you're a redhead" Jasper told him "plus, you have slim hips"

"What?"

I was watching as Jasper found a rock around the side of the house, then came back and squatted down in front of a small window.

"One" he was saying "Two…"

"Wait" I called out and he stopped.

"I thought you left" Jasper said "Couldn't do it, could you?"

"Do you have a credit card?" I asked him

He and the drummer exchanged looks. Then Jasper said "Do I look like I have a credit card? And what, exactly, do you need purchased?"

"It's to unlock the door, idiot" I told him, reaching into my back pocket. But my wallet was in my car.

"I have one" the drummer said slowly "but I'm only supposed to use it for emergencies."

We looked at him, and then Jasper reached up and smacked him on the back of his head "Tyler, you're a moron. Just give it to her"

Tyler handed over a Visa. I opened the screen door, then took the card and slid it between the lock and the doorjamb, wiggling it around.

A few pulls to the left, then the right, and I felt the lock give. We were in. I handed Tyler back his card.

"Impressive" he said, smiling at me in that way guys do when you impress them "Whats your name again?"

"Alice" I told him

"She's with me" Jasper explained. The dog was now trailing behind me. I bent down and petted him.

"That's Max" Jasper called "Him and me, we're a package deal."

"Too bad for Max" I replied, and stood up, walking to my car.

"You're a bad ass, Miss Alice" he said "But you're intrigued now. You'll come back."

"Don't count on it."

He didn't answer this, instead just stood there, leaning against a porch post.

**-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-**

**Sooo what'd you think?**

**R&R plz!**

**And I'm writing Camp Hale right now, I don't know when it will be up tho. **


	6. Chapter 6

Hi guys....so i came on fanfiction today and I looked in my documents. There was nothing there. I'm not even kidding. I had every story in there with an update and then it was all gone. And I don't keep the stories in my Word Document, I put them in here. I finished some of them a ocuple weeks ago, I've just been so busy. I haven't had any time to update. In the last 3-4 months I have had 5 papers due. 6 projects. Over 15 tests. And in a couple weeks I have track that like messes up my life more. I also haven't updated because someone in my family died last month so i went to that funeral. Then a couple days ago, my great-grandma fell down the stairs and broke her hip. When I started these stories I had so many ideas for them...then I just forgot them. You know what I mean? And I will try to update. It just won't be any time soon. If you have any ideas, e-mail me because I could really use them. Don't worry. I WILL update.

Lily


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: see previous chapters.

...

Emmett opened the door to Rosalie's apartment. He was wearing a tie.

"Late," he said flatly.

I glanced at my watch. It was 6:03, which, according to Jessica and Angela and everyone else who had always made _me _wait, meant I was well within-five-minutes-doesn't-count-as-late rule. But something told me maybe I shouldn't point this out just now.

"She's here!" Emmett called out over his shoulder, then shot me the stink I as I waked in, shutting the door behind me.

"I'll be right out," Rosalie replied, her voice light, "Offer her something to drink, Emmett?"

"This way." Emmett started into the living room. As we walked our shoes made swishy noises on the carpet. It was the first time I've been to Rosalie's, but I was surprised by the décor. Instead of the high class girl she is you think her house would resemble her, but it was the complete opposite. Her couches were a dark red and there was a normal size TV on the far back wall. Magazines were spread all over her coffee table and as I studied the photos on her wall closely, I could tell that these were pictures she took herself. She had a real talent.

I sat on the couch, and Emmett brought me a root beer, which he knew I hated, but thought I deserved. Then we sat down, him on the couch, and me on the love seat. Across from me was a large plant.

"I didn't realize it was a formal occasion," I said, nodding at his dark blue tie.

"Obviously," he shot back.

_Ooookay._

I glanced at myself: I had on dark jeans, a purple t-shirt, with white boots barely passing my ankle. I looked fine, and he knew it. There was a clang from the kitchen, which sounded like an oven closing, and then the door swung open and Rosalie emerged, smoothing down her blouse as if it was already wrinkle free enough.

"Alice," she said, coming over and bending down to kiss my check. This was new. It took my all not pull back, from surprise, but I stayed, knowing my brother would give me another dirty look. The shock on my face was clearly there because my brother smirked at me from the corner of my eye. If only I could smack him. Rosalie settled down beside him on the couch and grabbed his hand. "I'm so glad you could join us."

"Oh, like wise." _Kill me now._

The room was filled with an awkward silence. Before anyone could start another "conversation" the buzzer in the kitchen went off. Rosalie quickly let go of Emmett and got up. A couple seconds later an entrée was brought in. Crackers and some dip stuck that looked absolutely disgusting. Not that I would ever say something like that.

"So," she said, after we all had a cracker or two, "what do you think about what's happening with the elections in Europe, Alice?"

What?

I took a sip of my drink and thought about this for a second. "Actually, I haven't really been keeping up with the new lately." Well, it was the truth wasn't it?

"Oh, it's fascinating," she told me. "Emmett and I have been discussing how the outcome could affect our global economy, haven't we, honey?"

My brother swallowed the cracker he was chewing, cleared his throat, and said, "Yes."

And so it went. In the next fifteen minutes, we had kept a discussion going even if I wasn't paying attention. Discussions ranged from global warming, cars, books that we've read, and so much more that I can't even remember. By the time it was dinner, I was exhausted. I just wanted to go home and sleep for the next day and a half.

"Great chicken, sweetie," my brother said as we dug into our plates. Rosalie had made some complicated looking recipe involving chicken breasts stuffed with sweet potatoes and vegetables. They looked perfect; the kind of perfect you'd see in an ad or on TV.

"Thanks," Rosalie replied, reaching over to pat his hand. _Gag me with a spoon. _"More rice?"

"Please." Emmett smiled at her as she dished more food onto his place and I realized, not for the first time, that I hardly recognized my brother anymore. He was sitting there as if this was the life he was used to, as if he'd ever know was wearing a tie to dinner and having someone fix him some exotic meals on what clearly were the good plates. But I knew differently. We'd share the same childhood, were raised by the same woman. The transformation of Emmett, my stoner brother with a police record, to _Emmett_, man of culture and ironing. There were only a few more kinks to work out. Me.

"So your mother and Carlisle get back Friday, correct?" Rosalie asked me.

"Yep," I said, nodding. I turned to Emmett and said, "So we haven't done it yet, you know."

He blinked at me, his mouth full of rice. Then he swallowed and said, "What?"

"The wager." I waited for him to catch up, but either he didn't know or he was pretending not to. Oh, this was going to be fun.

"What wager?" Rosalie asked, looking between both of us.

"It's nothing," Emmett mumbled. He was trying to kick me under the table, but was failing miserably.

"Years ago," I said to Rosalie, as he took another swipe at me, barely nicking the sole of my shoe, "when my mother married the second time, Emmett and I started a tradition of laying bets on how long it would last."

"This bread is just great," Emmett said quickly to Rosalie. "Really."

"Emmett was ten, and I must have been six or so," I continued. "This was when she married Chris, the professor? The day they left for the honeymoon, we each sat down with a pad of paper and calculated how long we thought they'd stay together. And then, we folded up our guesses and sealed them in an envelope which I kept in my closet until the day my mother sat us down to tell us Chris was moving out."

"Alice," Emmett said in a low voice, "this isn't funny."

"He's just mad," I told her, "because he's never won yet. I always do. Because it's like blackjack: you can't go over. Whoever comes closest to the actual day wins. And we've had to really be specific about the rules over the years. Like it's the day she tells us it's over, not the official separation day. We had to establish that because when she and Kenny split Emmett tried to cheat."

Now, Emmett was just glaring at me. Sore loser.

"Well, I think," Rosalie said her voice high. "That is just horrible. Just _horrible_." She put down her fork carefully and pressed her napkin to her lips, closing her eyes. "What an awful way to look at marriage."

"We were just kids," Emmett said quickly, putting his arm around her.

"I'm just saying," I said, shrugging. "It's like a family tradition."

Rosalie pushed out her chair and picked up the chicken dish. "I just think that your mother deserves better," she snapped, "than for you to have so little faith in her." And then she walked into the kitchen, the door swinging shut behind her.

Emmett was across the table at me so quickly I didn't even have time to put down my fork: he almost pierced his own eyeball. "What the hell are you doing?" he hissed at me. "What the _fuck _is wrong with you, Alice?"

"Gosh, _Emmett_," I said. "Such language. You better not let her hear you, she'll make you stay after school and write a report."

He sat back down in his chair, getting out of my face. "Look," he spat." I can't help it if you're a bitter, angry bitch. But I love Rosalie and I won't let you play your little games with her. Do you hear me?"

I just looked him.

"Do you?" he snapped. "Because dammit, Alice, you make it really hard to love you sometimes. You know that? You really do." And then he pushed out of his chair, threw his napkin down, and pushed through the door into the kitchen.

I sat there. I honestly felt like I'd been slapped. I'd just been messing around with him and he just freaked. All these years Emmett was the only one who'd ever share my sick, cynical view on love. We'd always told each other how we'd never get married, shoot me if I do. But now, he'd turned his back on everything. What a chump.

I could hear them in the kitchen, her voice quiet, his soothing. On my plate my food was cold, just like my heart.

...

"Nope." The bartender shook his head, putting a cup of coffee in me. "She's cut off."

I wiped my face and slide my hands to my hair and ran my fingers through it. "I'm fine," I said. Or slurred. Maybe. "I only had a couple." The guy next to be just laughed.

"I know. They don't know anything," he said. "So, a girl like you must have a boyfriend."

"Nope," I said, poking at my coffee with a straw.

"I don't believe you," he said, picking up his drink. "are you lying to me?"

I sighed. This entire scenario was like the default talk-to-a-girl-at-a-bar-script, and I was only playing along because I couldn't even get off the stool without stumbling. At least Bella was coming. I'd called her. Hadn't I?

"It's the truth," I told him. "I'm really just a bitch."

He looked surprised at this. "Now who told you that?"

"Everyone," I said.

"I've got something that'll cheer you up," he said.

"I bet you do."

"No, really." He raised his eyebrows at me. "Out in the car, Come with me and I'll show you."

I shook my head. Like I was that stupid. Anymore. "Nope. I'm waiting for a ride."

"I'll make sure you get home. Come one." And the he put his hand on my arm, curling his fingers around my elbow.

"Let go," I said, trying to tug my arm back.

"Don't be like that," he said, almost affectionately.

"I'm serious," I told him, jerking my elbow. He held on. "Let go."

"Oh come on, Alison," he said, finishing his drink. He couldn't even get my stupid name right. "I don't bite."

Then he started to tug me off my stool. Before I knew it I was on my feet, then getting yanked through the crowd.

"I said let go, you fucking asshole!" I pulled my arm loose, hard, and it flew up, smacking him in the face and sending him stumbling backward. Now people were looking at us. How had I let this happen? I could feel the shame rising up in me, flushing my face. Everyone was looking at me.

"Okay, okay, what's going on here?" That was Aidan, the bouncer.

"We're just talking at the bar and we go outside and she freaks," he says, pulling at his collar. "Crazy bitch. She _hit_ me."

I was standing there, rubbing my arm, hating myself. I knew if I turned around I'd see that girl again, so weak and screwed up. She'd go to the parking lot, no problem.

"God, this is swelling," he continued whining. What a wuss. If I'd hit him on purpose, well that'd be different. But It was an accident.

"You want me to call the police?" Aidan asked.

I was suddenly so hot. The room tilted, just a bit, and I closed my eyes.

"Oh, man," I heard someone say and suddenly there was a hand enclosing mine, squeezing slightly. "There you are! I'm only fifteen minutes late, honey, no need to cause a commotion."

I opened my eyes to see Jasper standing beside me. Holding my hand. I would have yanked it away, but honestly I thought better of it.

"This doesn't concern you," Aidan said to Jasper.

"it's my fault, though," Jasper replied in that quick, cheesy way of his. "It is. See, I was late. And that makes my sweetums so foul tempered."

"God," I said under my breath.

"Sweetums?" the guys, whose name I never found out, repeated.

"She clocked him," Aidan told Jasper. "Might have to call the cops."

Jasper looked at me, then the boy. "She hit you?

Now he didn't seem so sure, instead pulling at his collar and glancing around. "Not exactly."

"Honey!" Jasper looked at me." Did you really? But she's just a little thing."

"Watch it," I muttered under my breath.

"You want to get arrested?" he said back, just as low. Then back in a cheery mode, he said. "I mean, I've seen her get mad before, but hit somebody? My Alice? She's not even ninety pounds soaking wet."

"Either I call the cops or I don't," Aidan said, "but I got to get back to the door."

"Forget it." The boy told Aidan. "I'm out of here." And the he slunk off, not before I noticed his eye was swelling. Wimp.

"You." Aidan pointed at me. "Go home."

"Done," Jasper said. "And thank you so much for your handling of this situation."

We'd left Aidan there, mulling over whether he was insulted. As soon as we were outside, I yanked my hand loose from Jasper's and started down the stairs to the pay phone.

"What, no thank-you?" he asked me.

"I can take care of myself," I told him. "I'm not some weak woman who needs to be saved."

"Obviously," he said, "you just almost got arrested for assault."

I kept walking.

"And," he continued, darting ahead of me and walking backward. "I saved your butt. So you, Alice, should be a little more grateful. Are you drunk?"

"No," I snapped. "I'm fine. I just want to call for a ride and get home, okay? I had a really shitty night."

He dropped back beside me, sticking his hands in his pockets. "Really."

"Yes."

We were at the phone now. I reached into my pocket: no change. My head hurt, I was deadly thirsty, and now I was stuck. I put my hand over my eyes and took a few good, deep breaths to steady myself.

Don't cry, for God's sake, I told myself. This isn't you. Not anymore. Breathe.

But it wasn't working. Nothing was working tonight.

"Come on," he said quietly. "Tell me what's wrong."

"No," I sniffled and hated the way it sounded. Weak. "Go away."

"Alice," he replied. "Tell me."

I shook my head. How did I know this would be any different? The story could have been the same, easily: me, drunk, in a deserted place. Someone there, reaching out for me. It had happened before. Who could blame me for my cold heart?

And that did it. I was crying, so angry at myself, but I couldn't stop. The only time I ever allowed myself to be this weak was at home, in my closet, staring up at those stores with my father's voice filling my ears. I wished so much that he was here. He said it himself, in the song: he'd let me down. But still.

"Alice," Jasper said quietly. He wasn't touching me, but his voice was very close and very soft. "It's okay. Don't cry."

Later, it would take me a minute to remember how exactly it happened. If I turned around and moved forward first, or he did. I just knew we didn't meet halfway. It was just a short distance. And maybe it didn't matter so much whether he took the step or I did. All I knew was that he was there.


End file.
